Friday, 1 March 2019
March - is all about the uncertainty
Hello, how are you today?
Did February wreck you or did you find a way through?
Did you get to make your statements?
Are you ready to go?
How are you going to start?
What are you going to do?
Why are you doing that?
Arghhh!
All these questions hey!
All these questions that demand a neatly packaged response.
Yep, this is our third stage and these questions are coming for us.
They are coming for us from the outside and the inside.
These questions are going to come strong.
They are going to come loud.
And they are going to upset and distract us if we aren't just a little prepared.
Who in your world is asking you questions?
Who is sending you into a tail spin at the moment?
Is it family?
Is it friends?
Is it you?
From the outside, innocent enquiries of “so, what are you up to these days?” or "what do you do?" can send you on an excruciating journey of word mincing and body shifting as you worm your way through some uncomfortable explanation.
This picture came into being because one person asked me “What do you call that thing you do?”
Along with my uncomfortable, high pitched giggle and calling it my “basket weaving” it left me with all THOSE questions that I berate myself with - what the hell am I doing, what is this, is this really something or just me being weird? Can this ever sustain me financially - if not then why am I doing it - am I doing it just to make myself happy - isn’t that selfish - shouldn’t I be giving my time to more constructive things?
Sound familiar?
This month is all about knowing that you have no idea what this is - and then beginning to enjoy that, in fact insist on it. Do not try to package your "this" into anything just yet - it is too young, too frail, too innocent. Keep nurturing it, not forcing or directing it. Let it direct you - let it take you where it wants to go - let it take you at the speed it is ready to move. Get comfortable in that awkward space - let your brain go nuts trying to boss you around, but ignore it - or tell it to take 5 breaths and chill out - let it know, it will be alright. When you feel the strict voices come, hush them gently - not now, not now - no deadlines, no expectations just you and your project however it may look.
Where are you going with that?
No idea.
What are you gonna do with that?
Who knows.
What is the point of this?
We’ll know later.
How is this going to look?
Not sure yet.
Are you happy?
Good god yes!
Easy this one hey!
Quiet the mind, relax the well meaners, get a big cushion and schooch on into that comfy armchair. You might as well get comfortable because this could last a while.
All the best my friends with all the things.
CX
Friday, 1 February 2019
February - is all about the commitment
I am excited for this month's theme because it is kick up the bum time for me.
February is time to get on.
January was a lot in my head of what shall I do?
Where am I going..what do I want..who am I?
Blah, diddy blah, blah.
February is more about - let's go girl!
Now if you feel like you still don't have answers from January's investigation do not panic.
The exercise below is still for you.
I thought I had a good sense of what I was going to do this year, but my commitment exercise showed me how mis-guided I was and forced me to sit down and get honest and real.
Oh No! Not honest and real Caz..I'm not on the internet for honest and real.
I want escape and purdy.
I know, I know...but what if I could get you both?
See...now I have your attention.
Ok, so before I go into my spiel I should start out by saying that some of you are of course way ahead of the game.
Yes, yes, put your hands down we know who you are (ummm hubby)!
So if you are ready, concrete plan and concrete commitment then your month is easy.
Go to My Noisy Boys Facebook page and print out / fill out the commitment report I have posted there and away you go.
You got this!
Keep it somewhere easy for you to find and refer to if you feel you need a reminder of your plan of action.
Ok commitment phobe folks like me.
Walk this way.
I am going to take you through my process to show you how important this task is for us!
My first commitment sheet was this!
Isn’t that a grown up, business savy kind of commitment to make!
DO you know what happened as soon as I saw these words on paper?
I felt a mixture of sick, deflated and stressed.
Instead of burning that inner flame brighter – it dampened and snuffed it out.
It wasn't just that my years plan did not inspire me – it actually made me feel ill.
I have time constraints in my life right now.
Adding 2 MORE shows to my year as well as demanding time in the week just wouldn't fit with my current situation
and would just add too much stress to my family.
How could I have got this so wrong?
Wasn't this what I had been working towards for the last 4 years?
Wasn't this just the next step?
Apparently not for me.
Me feeling so ugly with what I thought "should" be the way for my year put me back a bit.
I went down the rabbit hole of, then why am I doing this?
Obviously I shouldn't be spending valuable time and money on this venture if I'm not ready to pursue it.
Spiral, spiral I went.
But then I chanced a chat with a friend and as she was talking about her own pursuit of goals she said something that completely resonated with me.
She said:
"I strongly believe that there is a place for me and what I have to offer, I just don't know how that looks yet."
Yes! This creative journey I have taken myself has never been about business.
It has been about my own sanity.
Connections with people since I started this journey though has been an amazing off shoot from this and is part of my fuel.
My pictures & words help me to understand the foggy things & sometimes they help other people too.
There is a place for this and there is a place for me - I strongly believe that too.
So after this tea and cake revelation I went back to my pukey commitment sheet, printed a fresh sheet out and wrote this:
These make me smile.
These give me friendly, realistic direction.
These keep me on track.
Making a commitment to ourselves is very important for the sustainability of our project for the year.
It is easy to start passion projects, but then come the days where you run into a problem or a life interruption or a crisis of esteem. Then working on the project can become a task or a problem in itself. You might be in a foul mood, a tired mood - you might be hangry and you won't be as passionate about turning up. This is just a natural part of project completion and we can discuss that later in the year, BUT if you are already starting with a commitment that isn't a real reflection of you and what you really love then you are setting yourself up for a fall before you have even started. Learn from my mistakes, please. You can print off as many copies of your commitment sheet as you need. You have a whole month to take those ideas out of your head and commit them to the world - then just check in and make sure they make you feel your coziest version of yourself - as then you know you're onto something truly exciting!
Best of Luck with it all
CX
Sunday, 13 January 2019
January - is all about the where to start?
Happy New Year gang!
How are you finding the start to your 2019?
I hit January like a slug…soooo tired and a little bit numb.
I can definitely see why I put rest as the first month for last year’s project.
The first week or so I was in total rest need.
Now I can start to feel the shift.
The rusty brain cogs are beginning to move, but v-e-r-y s-l-o-w-l-y.
That’s ok!
When I sat down to think about this January post, I realized we are all probably in different places with our year’s plans and our thoughts for our project. Some of us will have been ready off the block with the Christmas tree already disposed on Dec 26th and our “Year Goals” in pretty lettering stuck up on the fridge. Others of us (ummm me) are more passive processing – maybe on the couch, horizontal position, staring into space while zombie eating chocolate and murmuring “don’t know, chew, chew, what to do, chew, chew”.
With this in mind I've come up with 3 scenarios.
See if you can find you in there somewhere.
For the ready and raring to go
If you know exactly what project you want to work on this year, then this is for you.
Maybe you have everything in place and just need to start.
Maybe you have been working on something before and would like to commit more time and space to it.
Or maybe you just have a few easy, manageable things to set in place and you are ready to go.
The key for the ready and rarers is that the thinking and deciding period has already been done.
If this is you – you are doing great – permission to start.
Your word for the month is GO.
Go, go, go and enjoy.
For the hmmmm I think I have some ideas… but I’m not completely sure.
If you have an idea of something you have always wanted to do, but unsure how to start.
Or you have a few ideas for things, but unsure which to pick.
Then this one is for you.
My word for you this month is TRUST.
It seems like you already have a voice guiding you a little so this month learn to trust that voice that has given you these inklings.
Listen hard to what it is saying.
Your cloudiness could be due to all kinds of factors.
You may be scared, shy, pleasing others, or dealing with old opinions.
When we give ourselves the chance we often know exactly what we want to do.
It’s clarity just gets messed up by these others factors.
Don’t be hard on yourself – whatever you learn or do is ok.
Starts are just that, starts – they do not have to become big concrete goals.
If you have a couple of ideas and honestly can’t decide which to choose, start the one that most appeals.
If you needed a couple of things to start, then get those couple of bits (Aside - I said couple of bits…do not get overwhelmed at the store – start with one thing or a limited palette, you can go nuts later when you are more certain).
The key here is to start, play and TRUST your own movements.
There is no rush - slow is good.
When you go slow you move quietly and it is in this quiet that you hear properly.
Learn to trust that wise voice because that voice knows – it just needs encouragement to talk more.
For the Project Zombie
If you don’t have a clue what you want to do,
how to go about doing the thing you don’t know what to do
and don’t even know if you want to be doing the thing you don’t know what or how to do.
Then this one is for you.
I know it might not feel like it, but this is going to be the best month and the most fun.
Don’t get bogged down by the idea of a project.
This can sound too packaged when you are in zombie state.
Take it right back to the simple idea of happiness.
When I ..(what?)… I am happy.
What do you need to do to find the answer for this?
Look back at what sparked you when you were a child?
Remember something that has left your routine because of life things?
Is it as simple as enjoying a subject through books, a friend, tv?
Keep the idea as loose as possible,
as open as possible and take a step towards that.
Your project might not be very tangible straight away because you are still figuring out the flow of the path.
Let this be the enjoyment, not the goal seeking.
If best, don’t share these curiosities you will be following until you feel more sturdy.
People can well meaningly affect your flow with an off hand comment.
Your word I would say is PROTECT.
This process is vulnerable for you and important.
It will be building on a foundation so it is good to make sure you are feeling secure and sure-footed.
I was in this place about 4 years ago.
I was lost and unhappy.
I took steps so slowly and found my pictures.
The process of finding them felt sacred at times and other times like a painful squeeze.
I felt the joy they sparked, but the feeling was so fleeting at the beginning.
It is this fleeting spark though that you are looking for.
The spark is going to become a brighter and brighter light the more you do, but it begins as just this occasional flash.
What is it that creates this light in you?
No matter how small or silly it may sound to you at the mo – write it down,
or give space for remembering,
or just be awake and aware as you go about your business.
These are what can guide you for this year.
Excited now?
I hope it’s yes.
Whichever stage you are at, I want to welcome you to your own yellow brick road.
It is yours and only yours!
There is no one ahead or behind you.
There is no expectation of arrival or completion.
You are still a participant in the “musts’ of your daily life,
but this time you have your own little space in the world too and that little space is all yours!
Have great January Cx
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