My Noisy Boys + 1

The icky question of "and when will you be having a second?" came up this week at mother's group and it felt kinda funny to respond "mid April!". My usual response to this rather imposing question was a series of ramblings abt being unsure, not yet recovered from that first year of parenthood to a colicky, non sleeping child and the sheer exhaustion from being a busy mum to a busy boy. Hubby kept telling me to just say we're undecided, but without fail as soon as that question came up - the stutter would start, the sweats, the deer in the headlights look. The honest truth was I had absolutely no idea if we would ever have another child - but it seemed to be something everyone else seemed to need to know. "Oh - your going to be a single child family - I have a book you can read abt that" - someone told me. Really??? I had no idea that my ramblings of being unsure were leaning me to be categorised any certain way. We're just us at the mo - this is us and we like us - we're not a "social policy" - we're just living day to day and seeing where the next day will lead. The other coin was of course "Oh you CAN'T just have one"..."it is soooo much easier with 2 - they play together you see"....yeah right I'm thinking ...I have a sibling and I know that is simply not true, also who are these people telling me what I can and can't do, where are they with the night howls eh? So YES we are embarking on baby 2 journey...we are both very happy although honestly, slightly nervous abt having a BABY again and just hopeful that everything is ok. To all of you out there that are experiencing and struggling with that question of "and when will you be having another"....you could reply "undecided" "never" or "the sex is just too good for me to have a baby right now" - that would certainly end the conversation. To all of us out there too - lets just stop asking that loaded question..there are so many reasons out there why people may not chose, be able, or want to have another child - that isn't it best to just let people tell us if or when they want - than feel cornered in a quick chat at the supermarket.